Scatologic Verse: The BOTTOM LINE of MEDICAL HUMOR

Authors' Note: In North America, many proctologists now prefer to be known (professionally) as 'colorectal surgeons'.

Authors' Note: Borborygmi (plural of the Latin borborygmus) , a normal phenomenon, are rumbling noises in the abdomen related to movement of fluid and gas through gastrointestinal viscera (hollow organs).

 Authors' Note:  

  A euphemism allows one to skirt around the messy details. 

  Diarrhea, a term coined by Hippocrates, derives from the Greek for a flow going through; the details are linked by longstanding usage to the specific intestinal inconvenience, sometimes characterized as "the trots".

  The authors regret that there are no appropriate images to accompany this verse.

Authors' Note: The concept of a formal truce was approached by both parties following the authors' misguided indulgence in the preparation for an endoscopic procedure.

Authors' Note: 

cruciferae: vegetables in the cabbage family

Aspergillus: more fully, Aspergillus niger, the species of fungus from which chemists derive alpha-galactosidase, the principal active enzyme ingredient of flatulence-suppressants.  The concept of a supplement to suppress the discomfort and gas associated with eating vegetables such as beans and cabbage was presumably proposed by Benjamin Franklin in the 1780s. In 1981, Alan Kligerman initiated research that resulted in the development of the commercial enzymatic supplement Beano® , and a Nobel Prize in Medicine in 1991. 

  

Authors' Note: 'Aneous', a puerile neologism, has been used here to close the verse, as the proper medical term 'anus' may not function appropriately in this instance.

 

Authors' Note:  The long-term effectiveness of surgical and other treatments for hemorrhoids is disappointingly low. 

Related Verse:

AND, HERE'S A LIST OF LINKS to collections of intriguing verses on other medical/dental topics that can now be found on various posts including:

Patients and their Maladies (parts #1, #2 and #3)

The Bottom Line of Medical Humour

Funny Bones (parts #1 and #2)
Doctors and their Practices (part #1 and #2)

To Clot or Not to Clot

The Scopes of Modern Medicine

Handbook of Medical Testing Statistics

Organic Brain Poetry

Pandemic Verses

Poetry of Healthcare

STD Poetry

Diagnostic Imaging (selected topics)

Toxic Vignettes

Sleek Greek Prefixes

Dental Feelings

and in 'brief sagas' including:

Drug Development

Radiation Exposure

Methylated Spirits

The Gastro-Esophageal Junction

Workplace Pollution

Food Intolerance

Fluoridation

DIRECTION FOR WEB-TRAVELLERS: 

To resume daily titillations on our blog 'Daily Illustrated Nonsense', click HERE. Once you arrive, you can select your time frame of interest from the calendar-based listings in the righthand margin, and check the daily offerings for any month in the years 2020 to the present. (As of September 2022, there are 1000 entries available on the Daily blog, and most of these are also presented here on 'Edifying Nonsense' in topic-based collections.)