) JAN 25 (2023) singable satire: 'NIFTY WAYS TO LEAVE YOUR MUKLUKS'

 

Today's Offering (Jan 25, 2023):  SINGABLE SATIRE

PASTICHE of 2 ORIGINAL SONGS: a 'pair-ody'

MUSICAL UNDERPINNINGS:

Recipient Song (music): "Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover", Paul Simon, 1975.

Invading Song (lyrics): words and themes borrowed liberally from "Kokomo" 1988, as performed by the Beach Boys.

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, February, 2015. 

UKULELE and GUITAR-FRIENDLY LINK: Our whole series of songs can be found in a friendly format for ukulele (and guitar)-players on our sister blog "SILLY SONGS and SATIRE" with chord-charts for both the parody and original song, as well as helpful performing suggestions. 

 To find ukulele and guitar chord-charts to help you accompany "NIFTY WAYS TO LEAVE YOUR MUKLUKS" on your favorite instrument, click HERE.

Imagine that Paul Simon sang about a mid-winter escape to the Beach Boys' mythic Caribbean destination of Kokomo. 

NIFTY WAYS TO LEAVE YOUR MUKLUKS

(to the tune of "Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover")

“Your problem is worsened by this nasty winter freeze,

Let's get away to moonlit nights off the Florida Keys.

We’ll defy gravity, perfect our chemistry;

There are some nifty ways to leave your mukluks”.

She said, “Escape it all for a great place to go.

And by jet we’ll get way down there fast, then we can take it slow,

Everybody knows a dreamy place like Kokomo –

There are some nifty ways to leave your mukluks.”

Nifty ways to leave your mukluks.

All-inclu’ in Aru’, Lou

Bake in Jamaic’, Jake

A month in Bermud’, dude

Just get ourselves warm.

Few weeks in Baham’, Sam,

Don’t need lots of lead-time,

Mellow Montego, Joe

No snow – Largo Key.

       

Feel mystique -  Martinique, Zeke
Glimpse Port-au-Prince, Vince

Survey Montserrat, Matt

Bodies in hot sand.

Lounge in St Kitts, Fritz

Rhythm of a steel-drum band

Hop bars in Negril, Bill

And get yourself tanned.

She said, “It peeves me so, car battery has died.

And our street has not been plowed so all you’d do is slip and slide."

I said ”Snow day -  there’s little open, so nowhere else to ride –

Back to those nifty ways.”

She said, “Let’s try a snowy afternoon delight

Then we could drink some hot toddies and dream of those tropic nights.”

And because I kept on shivering, I called to book a flight,

I yearned for nifty ways to leave my mukluks.

Tour the bay by kayak, Jack

Get a new tan, Stan

Cruise to St Croix, Roy

Get keen on Holguín.

Surf Los Cabos, Gus

Don’t need skates or puck much

Explore cays and keys, Lee

mukluks -  seldom thought of
 as sensuous

Just pack your sun-screen.

Scuba-dive off Arub’, Stu

Flake in Jamaic’, Jake

Swim nude in Bermud’, dude

Live what Beach Boys sing.

On lam in Baham’, Sam,

No need to trudge slush much

Just toke in Mo'Bay, mam'

A 'Kokomo' fling.

Wordplay maps: R-E-P-U-B-L-I-C-A-N-S in Canada (anagrams #5-8)

 

For more wordplay maps on this topic, click HERE.

To return to the original post, i.e. maps #1-4, click HERE.

GENERAL DIRECTIONS FOR WEB-EXPLORERS: 

To resume your review of the sequence of daily titillations on our related blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE. Once you arrive, you can select your time frame of interest from the calendar-based listings at the bottom of the page, and check the daily offerings for any month from the start of 2020 until July 2025. 

As of July 20, 2025, there are 2,000 unique entries available on the daily blog, displaying individual poems (often illustrated) and wordplay, but also with some photo-collages and parody song-lyrics. 

Most of the key elements, such as this one, are also assembled here on "Edifying Nonsense" in topic-based collections.

The "Daily" format, a formidable mix of genres, also has the advantage of including song-lyrics, videos and other material that are not shown here on this topic-based blog.

The frontier of doggerel: PALINKUs (palindrome-enriched haiku verses) from the year 2022

A continuation of our previous posts summarizing the introductory phase of this new poetic concoction....

Go back to review palinkus from the year 2020 by clicking HERE, and  for the year 2021 by clicking HERE.

An additional point: Where do the original palindromes come from?

The majority are in the 'classic repertoire' of this constrained but nonsensical form of writing. The authors are proud to report that they have apparently concocted at least some of the remainder. 

prior posted poems (2021)

canals

fruits #2

gender-roles

hats

identity

Kansas (KS)

partying #3

partying #4

ponderings

potatoes

sweet treats #1

Xmas scandal

CURRENT CONTENTS, posted 2022

Canadiana

conformity

Dennis's ongoing sin

evil

invective

lust indulged

magic palindromes

Paris (France and ON)

restaurants #1

schoolboy humor #1

sports

timidity

for continuation, see the link below.

Authors' Note: The continually widening circle of Dennis's sins is indicated by these recently discovered palindromes ...

Dennis and Ed, Nadine, Enid and Edna sinned. 

Dennis and Ed, Nadine, Eve, Enid and Edna sinned.

Dennis and Ed, Nadine, Eva, Dave, Enid and Edna sinned.

Dennis and Ed, Nadine, Eva, Dana, Ana, Dave, Enid and Edna sinned.

Authors' Note: The enhanced second slide in the above pair shows the poetic content in the form of only two palindromic phrases -- these are both 'magical palindromes'; indeed they are lengthy, but they allow the synthesis of ideas that would not otherwise be possible with regular paindromes. You can get up to speed on this intriguing wordplay variation by clicking HERE.   

\

You can continue this astounding journey, exploring our new poetic form. Click below for the next yearly collection of posted palinkus (one each month), as available on this blog-site.

2023

  

(Alternatively, you could proceed to our related blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", where we have in a more casual manner, published these terse verses one-at-a-time, usually on the 17th day of each month.)

GENERAL DIRECTIONS FOR WEB-EXPLORERS: 

To resume your review of the sequence of daily titillations on our related blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE. Once you arrive, you can select your time frame of interest from the calendar-based listings at the bottom of the page, and check the daily offerings for any month from the start of 2020 until July 2025. 

As of July 20, 2025, there are 2,000 unique entries available on the daily blog, displaying individual poems (often illustrated) and wordplay, but also with some photo-collages and parody song-lyrics. 

Most of the key elements, such as this one, are also assembled here on "Edifying Nonsense" in topic-based collections.

The "Daily" format, a formidable mix of genres, also has the advantage of including song-lyrics, videos and other material that are not shown here on this topic-based blog.

Review of 'brief sagas' from 2022

 

 A NOTE from the EDITORS: 

 As readers may have gathered, these blogs highlight several types of light, wistful and humorous reflections on current life, chief among them  short verses using the limerick format, more or less (see the blogpost "Limerick Variations"). But on occasion, we feel the urge to continue important themes through several stanzas worth of poetic ideas. So in this post, we highlight the previous years' offerings of 'lengthier' poems of at least 15 lines or 3 stanzas. We have been publishing these at the rate of once a month on "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", but as they are found mixed with shorter verses of 5 lines, i.e. standard limericks, or even 3 lines --palinku (palindromic haiku), you might have failed to notice and review them in their entirety. 

  This summary gives you a second chance to explore these lengthier creations that contain as many as 6 stanzas -- hardly lengthy enough to be considered a genuine saga, but we hope reflecting the authors' sagacity.  

  The compressed mode in which our 'sagas' are displayed may enhance your appreciation of the range of topics covered; if you prefer to enjoy the details in a larger and more readable font, you can quickly access the posts on this blog devoted uniquely to their stanza-by-stanza display (as well as notes, related photos and videos), by entering their title into the search lines provided. And from there, you can, of course, explore further to enjoy the multitude of shorter verses.  

CURRENT CONTENTS (from 2022)

Anglo-Latin                      Apr

Attribution: Ogden Nash Feb

Bequest                           Mar

Beri-beri                          Sep

Canada                            Jun

Careers                            Jul

Drug development          Jan

Echoic binomials             May

Hemianopsia                   Dec

Mar-a-lago                       Aug

Metabolic delirium          Oct

Palindrome workshop     Nov

 

For the curious reader's convenience, we have sorted our treasury of 'brief sagas' by the year of publication on this blog. Altogether, you will find more than 40 whimsical poems, that cover about 800 lines of verse. 

Click below, and enjoy!
2020
2021
2022

GENERAL DIRECTIONS FOR WEB-EXPLORERS: 

To resume your review of the sequence of daily titillations on our related blog "Daily Illustrated Nonsense", click HERE. Once you arrive, you can select your time frame of interest from the calendar-based listings at the bottom of the page, and check the daily offerings for any month from the start of 2020 until July 2025. 

As of July 20, 2025, there are 2,000 unique entries available on the daily blog, displaying individual poems (often illustrated) and wordplay, but also with some photo-collages and parody song-lyrics. 

Most of the key elements, such as this one, are also assembled here on "Edifying Nonsense" in topic-based collections.

The "Daily" format, a formidable mix of genres, also has the advantage of including song-lyrics, videos and other material that are not shown here on this topic-based blog.

) DEC 25 (2022) singable satire: the climate cynic's song -- 'GLOBAL ROASTING CAN BE SET ASIDE"

 ORIGINAL SONG: "The Christmas Song", a.k.a. "Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire..." written by Wells and Tormé, 1944; recorded by the Nat King Cole Trio in 1946.

PARODY COMPOSED: Giorgio Coniglio, November 2014.
PARODY-SONGLINK: To access ukulele chord-charts to help you accompany "GLOBAL ROASTING CAN BE SET ASIDE" on your favorite instrument, click HERE.

THE CLIMATE-CYNIC'S SONG
("Global Roasting Can Be Set Aside")

(to the tune of "The Christmas Song")  
 

Al Gore
former U.S. Vice-President

Planet’s roasting can be set aside.

Al Gore’s nightmare can’t unfold -

Records tumbling, roads closed, bursting pipes

And six-foot drifts in Buffalo ...  

   ...Armchair  experts doubt, outliers like some melting floes
Help predict our global fate.
Tiny dots graphing century lows-
 Warm some years, but it’s not too late.

We know that Sa-anta’s on his way;    

If he brings shorter winters here - more time to play!

I’ll ditch my snowboots, yet retire in my town,

‘Cause rising seas may make South Florida drown.

And so I send November sympathies,

Where Christmas came too soon this year -

Although it’s been said many times many ways,

Glad it didn’t, glad it didn’t,

Glad it didn’t hap - pen here.