Monday, 20 September 2021

Lyrics for Singable Satire: Frank Sinatra Sings "PROSTATE CANCER"

 PARODY-LYRICS

ORIGINAL SONG"Love and Marriage", 1955, Cahn and van Heusen, performed by Frank Sinatra, also Peggy Lee and Dinah Shore.
PARODY COMPOSED: Dr.G.H. and Giorgio Coniglio, January 2016.

KEYWORDS: goldenoldy, medical


Humor is likely still the best medicine, even for retired physicians.

PROSTATE CANCER 

(to the tune of “Love and Marriage”: indentations at beginnings of lines flag the syncopation.) 

Strange behavior, prostate cancer
   Danger lurking down there in your pants, sir?
Age-effect? guys wondered;
So, “Yes”, you’ll have it at one hunderd.


(bridge) 
Most such tumors are just harmless 
‘Cancer in situ’ [1] 
You’ll kick can from other cause, yet 
Con...cept might befright you.

If you’ve got 10 years to squander
    These are treatment outcomes you should ponder:
No spread when detected -
Five-year survival’s not affected!

(But) Certain cancers are bad actors
   Younger age and bad genes are risk factors
Yet we’ve got the greatest,
For early pick-up: PSA-test [2]

(bridge) 
Try set frequency and onset;
Screen to detect’em.
Current guide adds DRE [3] - that’s
   .... Finger-up-rectum.

DRE and PSA-test
   If they’re worrisome you’ll face the next step
To resolve the issue
Your doc will want to get some tissue.

Cut and cure my prostate cancer?
   Ask your Uro, he’ll provide the answer.
Positive biopsy –
Might turn your life-plan turvy-topsy.    

Plan for treatment and prognosis
  That depends on what your Gleason-score [4] shows
“Six” - equivocation
You might pick watchful expectation.

(bridge)
Sigh! Why try avoid? Decide [5], if
You’ve drawn a “Seven”.
There’s no call for you to bawl
Or ....  pack bags for Heaven.

If it’s surg(e)ry, I’d subject me
   To a retropubic prostatect(o)my;
Radical excision
Routine or high-tech [6] - your decision.

Kids, I’m betting on the cure–oh!
    So I’m heading home to see my Uro
As I told your mother, 
“Four decades passed, they went by fast,
Four decades passed, let’s spend ano-o-other.” 

Readers are advised to inform themselves to the extent possible, and
then discuss the many issues involved with their health provider. Excellent online material is available at the American Cancer Society website. 

[1] cancer 'in place', which has not invaded locally or spread beyond the prostate gland.

[2] Prostate-Specific Antigen; a protein which leaks into the blood at a rate proportional to the activity of prostate cells; frequently used to help detect and monitor cancer. 
  
[3] Digital Rectal Examination by your urologist, or other doctor - not pleasant, but important.

[4] a measure of the abnormality in cell-type on either biopsy or surgical specimens, on a 10-point scale, based on the 2 most abnormal patterns found within the gland. 

[5] at this stage, treatment is usually recommended to eliminate all prostate tissue. Surgery is the more common choice, but various forms of radiation (external beam or implantation of radioactive beads) have also been used.

[6] recently, high-tech variants (laparoscopic and robotic surgery) have been developed, but their additional benefit is incompletely proven.  


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Wednesday, 15 September 2021

Reversing Verse: PANAMA PALINDROME PARODIES (classic and novel)



   This post provides a continuation of wordplay collections displayed on December 5, 2020, through March 10, 2021. In these, classic palindromes (phrases and sentences whose letters are ordered identically when they are read either forwards or backwards) were described and extolled in verse by the team of Dr. G.H. and Giorgio Coniglio. The contents of the most recent post included these illustrated verses: 

25. Zeus sees Suez 
26. Step on no pets  
27. Do geese see God?  
28. No 'D'; No 'L' -- London (negation) 
29. The IPP (iconic Panama palindrome): A man, a plan, a canal -- Panama
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For your review, here's Giorgio's verse about 'the IPP' (designated above as #29:





CURRENT CONTENTS

Please note that, continuing the convention adopted in the previous posts, there will be an exclusive correlation between green italicized font and palindromes. But not all of the palindromes displayed within the verses' lines are in the 'classic repertoire'. Some are recent concoctions by the authors. But of course, all the poems highlighting the wordplay  are verses written jointly by Dr. G.H. and Giorgio Coniglio.

1. Classic spoof on the IPP: A man, a potato -- Panama.
2. Classic spoof on the IPP: A man, a plan, a cat, a hat, a canal -- Panama.
3. Classic spoof on the IPP: Sir, a plan, a canal -- Paris
4. Classic spoof on the IPP: A dog, a plan, a canal -- pagoda
5. Classic spoof on the IPP: Amen, a pit -- Ipanema.
6. Novel concoction: One man, a plan, a canal -- panameƱo
7. Novel concoctionA girl, a plan, a canal, pal -- Riga.
8. Novel concoction: A man, a Pan -- a panama. (hats)
9. Novel concoction: A man, a plan, if final -- Panama. 













































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Friday, 10 September 2021

Wordplay Maps: CHEMICAL STATES and PROVINCES


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Sunday, 5 September 2021

American Satire: A TERM of ENDIREMENT #5


This post provides a follow-up to 
"AMERICAN SATIRE (A Term of Endirement) #1"
"AMERICAN SATIRE (A Term of Endirement) #2"
"AMERICAN SATIRE (A Term of Endirement) #3"
and "AMERICAN SATIRE (A Term of Endirement) #4"
























FOLLOW-UP

Thee carnage continues as we move into the next term in US politics! Owing to intense demand for more verses of this type,  we have worked hard to accommodate your wishes; in fact, there is now a sequel to the original five posts! So, you can view another group of these gut- and heart- wrenching poems by clicking this link !



If you have enjoyed these verses on the theme of American political satire, you might like to proceed to view other items in our collection including:

- 'a brief saga: Mar-a-Lago
- 'political palindromes A through P' (click HERE to start).
There are also some parody-song lyrics posted in 2019 and 2020, that you might like, including: 
- 'The Ballad of Giuliani', part I and part II.



DIRECTION FOR WEB-TRAVELLERS: 

To resume daily titillations on our blog 'Daily Illustrated Nonsense', click HERE. Once you arrive, you can select your time frame of interest from the calendar-based listings in the righthand margin, and check the daily offerings for any month in the years 2020 to the present. (As of September 2022, there are 1000 entries available on the Daily blog, and most of these are also presented here on 'Edifying Nonsense' in topic-based collections.)